tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.comments2010-01-29T11:44:32.710-08:00iJizablogJizahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01453380302784838043noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-76809465910871035372010-01-29T11:44:32.710-08:002010-01-29T11:44:32.710-08:00Thanks for your comment! I couldn't agree wit...Thanks for your comment! I couldn't agree with you more! Your question is a good one... why does it seem so hard to enjoy what you have in lieu of always lusting for what you don't????Jizahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01453380302784838043noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-67066475794327040372010-01-06T08:23:58.515-08:002010-01-06T08:23:58.515-08:00I stumbled across your blog via bright side dwelle...I stumbled across your blog via bright side dweller. <br /><br />I enjoyed your soap box chat. There will always be people who consider themselves one step ahead that will question why you're not where they are.<br /><br />When single, people constantly remark about being coupled. When dating, people constantly remarking about marriage. When married, people constantly remark about children. After one child, people want to know if you'll have more. Then what? Grandkids? Retirement?<br /><br />Why can't we just let one another enjoy the current phase in life?<br /><br />Well, anyway...great post.Jilliebeaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09942917393320395696noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-65373196838468324072009-10-05T08:04:10.345-07:002009-10-05T08:04:10.345-07:00I know I'm a youngin', but I say moving fo...I know I'm a youngin', but I say moving for love is a-okay, as long as you're open to new places (maybe excluding the great state of Texas) and don't lose <i>yourself</i>. Following a man to a city you could possibly picture yourself in is one thing, but trading in your hopes and dreams to match his is quite another!<br /><br />Life is an adventure! You'll know what to do...Chelseahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05824764441410058119noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-90138346930553567392009-09-28T10:39:43.242-07:002009-09-28T10:39:43.242-07:00Hmmm... well, I know two people that have relocate...Hmmm... well, I know two people that have relocated. One is an actual man. His girlfriend's (is that even a terminology to use in our mid 30's? girlfriend/boyfriend)job has relocated her to Florida. She is taking the job offer and he is following her behind. His reasoning, if this is going to work I am going to have to relocate. This will be their first time living together. He will be proposing right before her move this October. <br />Another person is a classmate. She was torn with staying in the country she now calls home (USA) and where her love is (Hong Kong).Well, she decided that she is getting older wants a family and wants this to work.She moved this summer all the way to China...they are getting married. She was scared but she made a leap and she seems very very happy. <br />I think relocating for love might become a little more difficult if there are kids involve. None, of the above have children. I know five or six years ago I would have not relocated but now with more maturity on my side, knowing what I want and if both my partner and I are in agreement of what it is we want, I think I will do it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-65463702820768232062009-09-25T16:37:03.766-07:002009-09-25T16:37:03.766-07:00So you don't have any regrets about moving fro...So you don't have any regrets about moving from love even if ultimately that particular relationship didn't work out? I'm so glad to have the "been there done that" perspective... give us more Nicki!!!Jizahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01453380302784838043noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-36083424254190951582009-09-25T16:30:14.459-07:002009-09-25T16:30:14.459-07:00I would have to agree with you Jiza! I would defia...I would have to agree with you Jiza! I would defiantly move for love...although, six years ago after moving for love then, I would have said "NO". Since then, I have re-visited the thought and the answer would be...without a doubt "Hell Yes". Stay true to your heart!<br />xoxoNickihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08443338591219028257noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-79442274588172438972009-09-17T15:17:50.740-07:002009-09-17T15:17:50.740-07:00I like the way you think Jeff...
I must also pose...I like the way you think Jeff... <br />I must also pose the question at hand to you... from a "not-exactly-single" male perspective... would you move for love? If you met the person of your dreams and they were everything you ever wanted in a mate, but lived in Podunk, Iowa, would you move to be with them?Jizahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01453380302784838043noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-7118123765027934942009-09-17T14:59:33.265-07:002009-09-17T14:59:33.265-07:00Caveat: Not-exactly-single guy commenting. :)
I h...Caveat: Not-exactly-single guy commenting. :)<br /><br />I have no silver-bullet answer to these concerns, but some things that your post made me think about:<br />-- even if you're willing to move, it might matter *where* you're being asked to move--true love in NYC might be ok, while true love in Dallas, maybe not so much?<br />-- who says the guy can't move his ass to the Bay Area to be near you, rather than the other way around? <br />-- Is it naive of me to ask whether it's better to aim for True Love or to see how things develop between you and men you're dating? Maybe you have to do a bit of both.<br /><br />I have millions of other ideas, but very curious to hear what all of your friends think of this...Jeff Pollethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13789663140920958914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-90147364831437435332008-10-20T09:11:00.000-07:002008-10-20T09:11:00.000-07:00It might be good to keep in mind that you are not ...It might be good to keep in mind that you are not the <I>only</I> common denominator; men are taught to be emotionally unavailable. That isn't to say that all men are emotionally unavailable, of course, bit it's probably important to keep in mind the ways in which society shapes the pool of men you have to choose from.<BR/><BR/>(Also: Would you want to be with a guy who didn't like that you wear your heart on your sleeve?)Jeff Pollethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13789663140920958914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-43970065936080995392008-10-18T19:42:00.000-07:002008-10-18T19:42:00.000-07:00I love you Eb.I love you Eb.Jizahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01453380302784838043noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-9202357245013714842008-10-17T21:31:00.000-07:002008-10-17T21:31:00.000-07:00Hello gorgeous,I pray that you and your dream guy ...Hello gorgeous,<BR/><BR/>I pray that you and your dream guy are still going well. You deserve it. I lament that we did not get a chance to see each other before I left. I miss you. You are so sweet, talented, interesting and beautiful, I always wish you the best. I expect to see you so some in this tiny world that we live in. Stay sweet and keep smilin' = = EbAngry Black Puerto Ricanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16484900298756152229noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-86987769591485155482008-10-10T09:11:00.000-07:002008-10-10T09:11:00.000-07:00I'm not sure what all of your deal-breakers are, b...I'm not sure what all of your deal-breakers are, but I wouldn't, in general, say that you should lower your standards regarding what you want (I say this in part because I know you also have high standards for friendships, and for yourself). <BR/><BR/>I do, however, think that the attitude of just welcoming love into your life as much as possible is a good way to go. Of course, I'm older than you and have never been married, so take it with many grains of salt. :)Jeff Pollethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13789663140920958914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-46253631391445685112008-09-28T14:34:00.000-07:002008-09-28T14:34:00.000-07:00The Eligible Women ShortageOf course no amount of ...The Eligible Women Shortage<BR/>Of course no amount of maturity stops the panic. If you're still single you begin to wonder if there is something wrong with you. Why is it so many women who are not attractive, smart or funny seem to have no problem finding Mr. Right? Don't men like women with brains, looks, a sense of humor and well honed maternal instincts? If so, where are they! <BR/>In truth, Mr. Right is probably thinking the same thing about us ;).It's hard to believe, but there is actually a shortage of healthy, mentally-sound, non-addicted, heterosexual thirty-something females looking to get married. Once you reach 35, male or female, only 50% of the dating pool is healthy. Healthy means no addictions, mental diseases or other impediments to a successful relationship.<BR/>If you're 29ish-38ish single woman, The Wall Street Journal did an article on the women shortage December 7th, 2001. They reported many men waited until their late thirties and early forties to marry, wanting first to get their careers off the ground and become financially stable. These men are in the late stage baby boomer generation, (38-47), a very large generation. The women they date between 2 and 10 years younger? These women are part of Generation X, an itty bitty generation by comparison. Basically, single, childless thirty-something women, for the first time in history have three eligible straight bachelors a piece looking to marry. Unfortunately the article neglected to mention where to find them.<BR/>In 2000, Good Morning America did a segment on the ideal time to get married. It seems for women to be age 32, which is also the year she hits her sexual peak. The philosophy behind this stated that at 32, a woman has finally come into her own, confident in who she is and makes choices based upon fact rather than fantasy. <BR/> <BR/>At 32 she is still open to new ideas, but steadfast enough that she is not easily fooled or manipulated. The segment went on to explain that after 35 it is very difficult for a man or woman to marry because by that point, both are so set in their ways, compromise, an essential element to successful cohabitation is difficult to achieve.<BR/>Does that mean at 35 a woman is over the hill? And if you're in this age group, how do you cope and open yourself to love?<BR/>I have a few more years to reach the age of 35 but I'm trying my best to stat POSITIVE AND OPEN MINDED!!! Best wishes to us...keep the faith alive!<BR/>CinAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-24956465845899694472008-09-25T20:01:00.000-07:002008-09-25T20:01:00.000-07:00Ohhhh, I've read that too... can you elaborate on ...Ohhhh, I've read that too... can you elaborate on how it has changed your outlook on dating?Jizahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01453380302784838043noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-12995217247064209582008-09-25T16:04:00.000-07:002008-09-25T16:04:00.000-07:00Let me start by saying that I think blogging about...Let me start by saying that I think blogging about dating experiences, the good, the bad and the ugly is a wonderful idea. Just like Jiza I can write a novel on the things I have encountered in my quest for Mr. Right for me! I am happy to say that after reading Calling in the One my perspective on the dating scene has changed quite a bit. Although, encountering the ONE may not be an easy task I no longer view it as an impossible one. I have not met him yet but I am hopeful and that is a very good thing!mist31https://www.blogger.com/profile/06169747250798105934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-76930499899187220392008-09-25T13:41:00.000-07:002008-09-25T13:41:00.000-07:00Thanks for your comment... you bring up some inter...Thanks for your comment... you bring up some interesting and good points, however, I have to say, I truly believe the older we get the more set in our ways we become, thus coming to the table with baggage (ie. "time stamps/time tables") Furthermore as someone who absolutely loathes dating, but realizes that is the only way to meet someone, it is the constant disappointments and rejection that often leads to the "ah... fuck it... why bother?!" Wouldn't you agree? I mean how much can one person take? Yes, our hearts are resilient, but how much do you have to "put yourself out there" before you ultimately...(dare I say it...) give up?Jizahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01453380302784838043noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7956061612057217922.post-26639179354006048342008-09-25T13:29:00.000-07:002008-09-25T13:29:00.000-07:00I don't think it becomes harder to date when "30" ...I don't think it becomes harder to date when "30" comes around...<BR/><BR/>I think people sometimes put times stamps/time tables on what "needs" to happen within their lives (relative to dating/relationships) instead allowing things to flow....<BR/><BR/>(for example) There are so many beautiful women in the NYC that can't get a date for shit because every dude that comes around them acts like ass and give people like myself and other dudes no shot. So their left with the tainted idea that all guy that approuch them are like that.<BR/><BR/>I feel some woman are shut out from the idea that there could be a decent dude that may just want to really know their name or just want to complement them on therir dress or hair or shoes or eyes without them thinking this guy just wants to fuck them.....<BR/><BR/>I feel if women were more willing to relax a bit more...learn how to deal with an ass when being an ass....it will open the door to someone that can be really great, cool, funny and so on...<BR/><BR/>It's a two way street though...women and men alike, go though these dating cycles so much that they sometimes forget what they were "really" in it for in the first place. then it gets to a point were it's taking too long, hope is lost...."ah...fuck it...why bother?!" i'm sure we've all said that from time to time.<BR/><BR/>Just note...we (guys) are not all jerks or asshole...we want what you want...some of us (believe it or not) just want to be able to look at the person across from them and blush with amazement that i "may" have met someone that could possible complement me as i would for them...i know i do.<BR/><BR/>Sometimes the run around of dating can lead to (if not that right person) a great story for friends...i have plenty! lolDOThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04568051881601642051noreply@blogger.com